The Lingerie Experimentation
by crazyneonadventures
Summary: Ok, I already uploaded this but I had to take it down and fix it because the mistake were just bugging me SO BADLY. I don't own Homestuck, etc... Warnings: Language and Lemon in later chapters. Dave/Sollux. Don't like, don't read.
1. Dave's Situation

The Lingerie Experimentation Chapter One 2/27/13

_ Chapter One: Dave's Situation_

_ Buzzzzzz..._

"Ugh. Not now. I'm sleeping." Sollux placed his phone back on the nightstand and covered himself completely with the blanket, only the tops of his candy corn horns sticking out. He enjoyed these new earth beds. No slime, no mess, no problem.

_Buzzzzzz..._

"I said _not now_." He sneaked a look at the screen. Of course. It just _had_ to be him. Sollux picked up the phone, deciding to let his annoyance be known. "What the fuck do you want Strider? I trying to sleep, so make it quick."

"Lose the tone, lispy, and come help me. I'm in a bit of a situation here."

"Where's your brother? Get him to help you. I'm going back to bed."

"Wai-," _Click. _"Sollux? You better not have hung up! Sollux? SOLLUX!" Dave threw his phone down on the bed, and sat down on the edge. He put his head in his hands, smoothing his hair back, but carefully enough to avoid knocking off his shades. He always wore his shades. Ironically, of course. Kind of like the ladies' lingerie he was wearing. Totally ironic. It wasn't his fault he had no idea how to undo and get out of anything. It wasn't cool to think ahead.

Dave reached his arm around his back, contorting it in ways men were never meant to contort their arms, desperately trying to reach the bra strap. _Damn it! There's no way I'll live this down if I get bro to help me. This is beyond the meaning of the word uncool. This is...lame. Oh God. No. Bro can never know._

Panicking, -just ever so much more than, well, a lot-Dave decided to stick his head out of the door to see if Bro had come back yet. Bro had left about an hour ago to go to the "grocery store". Yeah, right. More like a certain video store because he was too embarrassed that someone might see his pay-per-view queue. When he saw nothing, Dave quickly shut the door and locked it, then ran over to the window and locked that too before shutting the blinds.

_Buzzzzzz..._

"Come on, please pick up. Plea-Urrghhh. Fucking voicemail." Dave pleaded with his phone as he redialed the number, pressing the green button. He tried again, and again, until the fourth try, he finally heard something other than voicemail. Dave jumped at his chance. "Sollux! Please, just hear me out okay? I'm sorry I called you 'lispy' just please, get over here and help me. I'm stuck in this shit, okay? I'm fucking stuck."

"Uhhhh...Dave?"_ Oh Shit. That's not Sollux. _Bro must have called just when he pressed the green button to dial. He cleared his throat, and mentally tried to get his mid in order. Once he had regained his cool-somewhat-the blonde boy decided he would just have to go ahead and face his Bro...or at least talk to him.

"Hello?Hello...Dave?Dave?DAVE!"

"Yeah, what? What the fuck do you want Bro? I'm in the middle of some serious shit right now, man. You're interrupting, you nosy assmonkey, now get the hell off my phone before I rip off your monkey tail and hang you from the roof with it." _I'm not going to be able to move after he comes home. I'm going to get the living shit beat out of me. Fuck._

"Well I guess that means you don't want any apple juice from the store then, asshole." _Click. _At least Bro had finally hung up. Dave dialed the moody troll's number again, this time very aware of any outgoing or incoming calls that might hinder his progress. _Progress in what? You're a shitty narrator. You can't even come up with a better word than progress? _Shut up, Dave. Little teenage hormonal bastard. _Bitch. _Can I get back to the story now? Thank you. Or would you prefer to be in a bra and garters for the rest of your life? Right. On the story...

_Buzzzzzz..._

"No. Not again. Not a-fucking-gain. I'm not doing it. I'm not...Damn it." A clawed hand reached out from underneath the blankets for a second time before noon that day. This was unacceptable. Sollux turned on the screen to reveal three missed calls, and another contact being attempted.

**AN: I'm sorry the chapter's so short, but I'm tired and going to bed. Maybe I'll upload another one tomorrow or something. No promises. Please review. Criticism is welcome, just please be gentle. Goodnight, everyone. I hope that those of you who read this enjoyed it.**


	2. Please, Just Help Me!

The Lingerie Experimentation

_Chapter Two: Please, Just Help Me!_

"What, Dave? What is just so goddamn important that you _had _to wake me up? Hmm? It better be good, or I'm kicking your ass."

"Please, just help me! I'm stuck in this weird lingerie shit and have no fucking idea how to get it the fuck off! Get it off! Sollux, please! I need your help okay?" This was so uncool. Striders don't beg. Striders don't plead for help.

"You're stuck in what? Bahahahaha!"

"Shut up and just help me okay? I can't undo the damn straps and this is starting to get really uncomfortable. Please come over."

"Alright. I'm not doing this to help you, though. This is just too good to miss." The troll couldn't help but snicker a little. _Now _this _might be worth waking me up. _"Umm...how, or why, exactly did you decide to-haha-sorry, it's funny."

"It is not! It was just supposed to be some ironic thing, okay? God, you're such a dick! Just...ugh...get over here!"

"Don't get your panties in a wad, Strider." Sollux couldn't help but laugh at his own joke. The extent to which he entertained himself could sometimes be a bit disturbing, but funny nonetheless...at least _he _thought so.

"Uncool, dude. So uncool." _I'm never getting out of this shit. _Dave paused for a moment and then, in entire sincerity (this has never happened before in the history of the Strider family) said,"I really need your help here, Sollux. I can't call my brother, because it's too embarrassing. He'd never let me live it down, and humiliation is something I just don't do well with."

The alien sat on the edge of his bed, putting on his shoes, blocking out Dave's blubbering. Then, he heard...Wait, no, that's not possible. Was Dave seriously asking him for help? With actual sincerity?_ What the fuck?_ Sollux began to listen, the socks forgotten halfway onto his clawed feet.

"I just-I can't deal with it, okay? I'm not-"

"Dave, just stop. I'll be over in a few minutes. Just kinda, you know, do that human breathing custom. What was it? Oh, yeah, just take a couple of deep breaths and wait right there. I'm leaving my house now."

**AN: Yeah, I know it's short, but there's another one coming tonight. Plus, it's kind of hard to write a really long chapter in the middle of class. Please review!**


	3. You Want Me, Strider

**AN: I'm sorry this took so long, but I'm a lazy bum and had the choice of either sleeping or writing this and the first rule of being a lazy bum is to**

**always choose sleep, no matter what. So, here's the third chapter. It's longer than I thought it would be, but is that necessarily a bad thing? Please**

**review and a big thanks to those of you who took the time to**

**read this! Also, I hate spelling mistakes as much or probably more than the next person**

**but now, I'm to the point of "Fuck it, I don't have time to SUPER-EDIT."**

**_ Chapter Three: You Want Me, Strider..._**

_ Ding. _Sollux rang the doorbell, knowing fully well that Strider would never answer the door in his "current state". Dave heard the doorbell, looked at his outfit, and quickly scanned the room. _Fuck. No robe_. Dave and Bro had robes, ironically...of course (even though they enjoyed slicking their hair back every once in a while to feel like Heff, even going out of their way to create a sexy smuppet calendar every year). The oddly clad teen warily unlocked his bedroom door, constantly turning his head to make sure Bro hadn't snuck in. _Ding. Ding ding. Ding ding ding ding ding di-_

"Jesus Christ, I'm coming! Just hold on!" Dave wrenched the door open, grabbed the collar of the troll's shirt and yanked him inside. They landed on top of each other, both squirming awkwardly to try and get away from the other.

"Get the fuck off of me, Strider! Damn it, what the hell is your problem?"Sollux looked at his (as the humans say) "friend", ogling, no eyeing-definitely _not _ogling the younger boy's strange attire. "How and why are you even wearing this? Nope, never mind. I don't wanna know how, and as for why, I'm pretty sure you'll just say 'Well it's ironic dur dur dur.'"

"Shut up and follow me." Dave slammed the door shut and dragged a rather unwilling troll back to his room, shutting and locking that door as well. "Now help me out of this shit."

"What's in it for me?" _He doesn't look half bad in this weird uh... What is it called again?_

"What?" _Oh fuck._

"I said 'What's in it for me?'" _Now that I thinking about it...he looks good. _Really _good. _The troll ogled-yes ogled-his prey. _Might be worth a shot._

"What do you mean?"_No. Fuck no. Never in million-Just fuck no._

Sollux just looked at Dave, an odd smirk starting to curl his lips. " You know..._exactly _what I mean. And you know..._exactly _what I want." He inched closer to Dave, the younger boy's body frozen in shock. The troll stepped closer, pressing himself against Dave, moving them both towards the wall, away from the door (which was locked anyway). Once they-or DAve, rather- were against the wall, Sollux ran his tongue over the shell of the other's ear, biting gently at the lobe, his teeth sharp enough to draw blood with the slightest amount of pressure. He bit down harder, lapping softly at the metallic liquid.

"Ah-Sollux? That hurts. What are you doing, man? Get off of me!" Dave squirmed, in the process knocking off his shades. _Shit._

"Stop squirming. We both know you want this. I see the way you look at me when I walk by. Admit it, Strider...You want me."

"What the fuck are you talking about? Get the hell off, you deranged alien creep!" Dave struggled violently against the hands holding his shoulder back. he didn't remember those being there earlier. Sollux held him down easily, fully aware he could overpower him at any time. He simply watched as Dave wriggled and squirmed beneath him, letting the boy tire himself out. Once he had exhausted the last of his energy, Sollux resumed his assault on Dave's ear, moving to his jaw. The stronger boy moved his prey's hand above his head, distracting him with a kiss as he started nudging his thigh against the smaller boy's growing erection.

Sollux smirked. "See Strider? You want me. I know you want me. And I want you to tell me _just how bad_ you want me." Before Dave could reply, Sollux captured his lips in a kiss, forcing his tongue into the-almost willing- mouth of his soon-to-be lover. The troll moved one of his hands down to palm Dave's growing erection.

"Ahh-Sollux! Stop...ple-mmpf!" Silenced by another attack on his lips, Dave finally gave in, but only enough to let Sollux kiss him...and maybe kiss back...just a little.

The troll's kisses were more gentle now, softer even. The blonde felt a soft tongue graze across him bottom lip, asking for entrance, and a slender hand make its way from his crotch to his back, undoing the clasps of the uncomfortable garment Dave just never should have looked at, much less put it on. He opened his mouth, letting Sollux explore every inch with his tongue, this time more affectionate and even sweet. He felt those slender, skilled hands move to his shoulders again, pulling of the lingerie (well, the bra anyway), letting Dave's arms go so he could free himself from the unwanted, uncomfortable fabric. Sollux, could see where the metal lining had started to make marks in his skin. The troll moved his gave from the boy's toned, but not extremely muscular chest, to his shoulders, his neck; finally he looked into Dave's eyes, now half-lidded and glazed over with lust.

This time, it was Dave who took over, pushing forward from the wall, leading Sollux towards his bed. He wrapped his arms around the taller boy, kissing him sloppily, a mixture of both boy's saliva beginning running down his jaw, onto his chin. Sollux felt himself being pushed back and downwards, beginning to panic, the troll flailed his arms but calmed himself once he landed on the bed.


End file.
